MRS. OLSON

Thanks to Meff for remembering her name. Of course I don't recall her first name.

Mrs. Olson was the librarian at Clarke for my 7th and 8th grade. She was a total bitch. There, I said it. Let's get that out of the way.

I don't know what her problem was. Perhaps she despised kids. She certainly didn't seem to like being around them. She had blond hair, and was perhaps in her early to mid-50's. She was always scowling, and was generally unpleasant to be around. She'd snap at you for no reason. I couldn't stand her.

One day in 7th grade, I'd had a detention after school, in Mrs. Westberg's room. It was probably around 4:00 or so when I got out. I headed back to my locker to drop off my books. On the way, as I walked down that long hall towards the library and locker area, I ran into her. She stopped me, and told me that I had to leave the school immediately. What??? She then told me that students weren't allowed to be in the school this late. Yeah, right. Who the fuck did she think she was? We shouted back and forth for a little while, before she "escorted" me out the door. All the while, her husband (who must have come to pick her up) mingled around in the background, saying nothing. I was so pissed! I had a pile of books. And I had no intention of carrying that stuff home. I wandered around the perimeter of the school, and found the set of doors right by my locker. As luck would have it, they weren't locked yet. I waltzed in and was unlocking my lock within two seconds. Suddenly I heard some singing. It was Olson's husband. He came by, was startled to see me, then called out to his wife, "Dear!" A few seconds later, Mrs. Olson was back, and bitchier than ever. She lit into me. I ignored her and calmly stuffed my books in my locker. When I was all done, I walked out the door and went home. Fuck her!

In 8th grade, I heard an interesting story about Mrs. Olson. I was in Mr. Franke's science class. Olson came in to drop off some book or something. As she walked out, she joked with Franke about something. Then once she was out of earshot, Franke cut off his laugh and said, "Witch!" The whole class roared. We knew. Then Franke told us a story about how earlier that year (or perhaps the year before) he had seen two students waiting around in the library for Mrs. Olson to appear. Franke knew where she was. So he walked down to the office, and told Mrs. Olson (who was engaged in conversation with the school secretary, Ms. Koeppe) that there were some students waiting to see her. She just said, "ok" and continued with her conversation. Franke stood there for a few moments, then said, "Don't you think you should go help them?" I don't recall what she said. But she more-or-less told him that she'd get there when she gets there. Disgusted, Franke went back to the library and told the two students that they should give up waiting, as Olson wasn't interested in doing her job. Witch indeed!

To my knowledge, I have never seen her since I left Clarke. I don't miss her either. I hope she's retired.